Comic #4492: fuel-efficiency

View Original Comic

Description

Here's a detailed description of the comic along with the transcribed text:

Comic Title: New Approaches to Fuel Efficiency

Idea 1: Car with Onboard Geothermal Power Generator

• Pros:
  • Charge anywhere, simply by sinking metal rod toward center of earth
  • Works in all weather, and on bottom of ocean
  • Neighbors will definitely know you are environmentally conscious
• Cons:
  • High upfront cost
  • Overuse may result in Earth's core dying, death of all surface life

Idea 2: Multistage Car

• Pros:
  • Used up stages can be jettisoned with little risk of danger to people inside car
  • Opportunity to tell police that only the third stage was speeding, and it’s a small percentage of overall mass
  • Can only be used one awesome time
• Cons:
  • Requires expensive radio receiver to communicate with mission control
  • Insurance claim process is cumbersome

Idea 3: Car with Anger-Capturing Interior

• Pros:
  • Harvests energy whenever you punch the ceiling, dash, or steering wheel
  • 20 mpg highway, 2,718 mpg city
  • Increases driver likelihood of listening to conflicting points of view on talk radio
• Cons:
  • Negates delightful feeling of hatred toward other drivers
  • Cannot yet harvest self-loathing

Idea 4: Car That Can Only Go Downhill

• Pros:
  • Accelerometer detects angle of vehicle, preventing wasteful upward or lateral motion
  • Will be extremely valuable if Earth discovered to be both flat and at an incline
  • Technically uses negative fuel when employing regenerative braking
• Con:
  • Is honestly kind of a stupid idea

Idea 5: Car That Only Technically Moves

• Pros:
  • Technically moving 30 kilometers per second relative to sun
  • Due to elliptical movement, vehicle is constantly accelerating
  • Energy of motion can be recovered by dropping Earth into sun
• Cons:
  • Hard drive to see movies
  • "Car" will continue moving long after you and everyone whoever cared for you are dead

This comic humorously explores unconventional ideas for improving fuel efficiency, highlighting both their pros and cons in a satirical manner.