Comic #3830: killing-hitler

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(Panel 1) We disagreed on how to use the new time machine. "I'm going back in time NOT to kill baby Hitler…"
"The consequences will be unpredictable!"

(Panel 2) But the results were hard to argue with.
World GDP is up 32%, happiness is up 56%, and toothbrush mustaches are worn with pride around the world.

(Panel 3) We became addicts.
"Let’s kill Stalin! And Genghis Khan! And the guy who first put raisins in cookies!"

(Panel 4) The results were incredible.
"Higher GDP, higher happiness, and Jesus comes to visit on weekends!"

(Panel 5) So, we kept going.
"Wait! The impaler? Jack the Ripper? The first guy who put raisins in cookies?"

(Panel 6) An opportunity arose.
"Thank you for voting for the time travel party. With your help, we can continue looking backward!"

(Panel 7) Introducing politics into the process proved to be a mistake.
"Your constituents demand that everything in the world suddenly get better at no cost."
"How about the pretty bad people?"

(Panel 8) We began to hunt the "semi-Hitlers" of history.
"I’ll leave my will here, so my roommates will have to do them."

(Panel 9) Had to kill larger and larger numbers of people to get the same improvements.
"And thus, can we gather them in a stadium and electrocute them?"

(Panel 10) "It’s not about them! It’s about the rest of us living well."

(Panel 11) Heavens!
"I forgot to include a thank you card when I gave all my savings to charity."

(Panel 12)
At last, I was the only one left.
"Look!"

(Panel 13) That was when the aliens from the future came.
"Whoa! We’ve got the worst species to eliminate itself?"

(Panel 14) "Galactic GDP is up 47%!"

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