Comic #2312: 2011-09-12

Description

Here's a detailed transcription of the text in the comic you provided:

Panel 1: Old Man: "THINGS ARE A LOT DIFFERENT NOW. WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE, YOU DIDN'T GET FUCKED IN THE ASS BY AN UNSYMPATHETIC STRANGER BEFORE YOU WERE ALLOWED ON A PLANE."

Panel 2: Child: "WEIRD!" Old Man: "Okay, Dad, okay… nice story."

Panel 3: Adult: "IT'S TRUE! THEY WOULD JUST GROPE YOU FOR A WHILE AND LOOK AT NAKED PICTURES OF YOU."

Panel 4: Man: "HOW DOES THE CURRENT SYSTEM CATCH TERRORISTS?!" Old Man: "YEAH, RIGHT. AND HOW DID THEY CATCH TERRORISTS?!"

Panel 5: Old Man: "I TOLD YOU! TERRORISTS HATE GETTING FUCKED IN THE ASS BY AN UNSYMPATHETIC STRANGER. IF WE HAVE EVERYONE GET FUCKED IN THE ASS BY AN UNSYMPATHETIC STRANGER, WE'RE SAFE!"

Panel 6: Adult: "YEAH… YEAH, I GUESS SAFETY'S IMPORTANT."

Panel 7: Adult: "WELL, I'D BETTER BE OFF TO MY FLIGHT."

Panel 8: Child: "SPEAKING OF WHICH, COULD I BORROW SOME LUBRICANT?" Man: "DAD, YOU KNOW THEY DON'T ALLOW LIQUIDS."

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