Comic #6981: together-3

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Description

Here’s the text from the comic transcribed as accurately as possible:

Panel 1: Alien: "HUMANS! WE HAVE COME TO TELL YOU OF THE GLORIOUS FUTURE."

Panel 2: Alien: "AS YOU KNOW, THE GOAL OF ALL ETHICS IS TO GENERATE THE MOST HAPPINESS."

Panel 3: Alien: "WE HAVE THEREFORE TAKEN ON THE PROJECT OF CONVERTING ALL MASS IN THE UNIVERSE INTO ONE VAST CIRCUIT OF EUPHORIA, DELIGHTING IN ITS OWN EXISTENCE FOREVER."

Panel 4: Human: "BUT WE DON’T WANT THAT. WE DON’T WANT OUR PLANET AND OUR HISTORY AND OURSELVES TO LOSE ITS SPECIFICITY AND ITS IDENTITY. WE WANT TO BE US!"

Panel 5: Alien: "BUT… BUT, WE'VE OBSERVED YOU. STEVE, YOU HATE YOUR JOB AND YOU SPEND YOUR WEEKEND SCROLLING VIDEOS AND FEELING SAD."

Panel 6: Alien: "MARIANNE, 90% OF YOUR LEISURE TIME IS SPENT MANAGING ANXIETY AND SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEMS!"

Panel 7: Alien: "YOU’RE ALL LIKE THIS! ALL THE TIME!"

Panel 8: Alien: "YOU HUMANS ARE REALLY GONNA CLING TO YOUR TINY BROKEN PERSONAL IDENTITIES WHILE EVERY OTHER SPECIES IN CREATION CONVERTS ITSELF TO A COSMOS-SPANNING RIVER OF PURE JOY?"

Panel 9: Human: "IF WE'RE ALL THE SAME, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL REALLY GOOD ABOUT HOW MY CAR IS BETTER THAN MY EX’S?"

Panel 10: Other Human: "YOU KNOW WHAT, WE'RE BOTH BETTER OFF SEPARATE."

This comic features a humorous exchange between aliens and humans about identity, happiness, and individualism.