Comic #6462: evolved-3

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Description

Here’s the accurate transcription of the comic:

Panel 1:

• Top text: "DEAR EVOLUTION, WHY DID WE EVOLVE TO BE AWARE OF OUR INEVITABLE DEMISE? WAS IT A BYPRODUCT OF CONSCIOUSNESS AND VAST INTELLIGENCE?"
• Character: "NAH."

Panel 2:

• Top text: "AWARENESS OF MORTALITY IS AN EVOLVED TRAIT DESIGNED TO ENCOURAGE EXCESSIVE DRINKING AND ILL-ADVISED UNPROTECTED SEX."

Panel 3:

• Character: "LOOK, YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT DOING IT RIGHT NOW!"

Panel 4:

• Top text: "SOMEWHERE OUT THERE, A GIRL IS BEING BORN WHO WILL GROW UP TO HAVE AN ABIDING AND BEAUTIFUL AWARENESS OF HOW FINITE MOMENTS ARE INFINITE IN THEIR TRANSCENDENCE AND SHE WILL NEVER, NEVER ACCIDENTALLY MAKE A BABY IN THE ALLEYWAY BEHIND KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN."

Panel 5:

• Character: "BUT I THOUGHT 'WINE IS PROOF THAT GOD LOVES US.'"

Panel 6:

• Character: "WHO?"