Comic #5129: turmoil

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Description

Here's a transcription of the text from the comic:

Panel 1:
Turmoil was roiling the planet.

Panel 2:
Actually, it was entirely social turmoil.

Panel 3:
This presented an enormous financial opportunity.

We can take the slogans of all the countercultures and market T-shirts to their followers?

Panel 4:
Automation simplified matters.

Our new system scans social media, detects new movements as they are born, predicts their ideals, and creates corresponding literature, merchandise, and events.

Panel 5:
But, if you respond to a market well enough, you inevitably end up shaping it.

People have stopped forming new social movements. But why?

Panel 6:
What's the point of starting, say, a violent anarchist resistance if your grandma's gonna send you a sweater about it for your birthday?

Panel 7:
We tried to buoy the market.

Would anyone like any literature on overthrowing the government? Each pamphlet was generously provided by Walmart and comes with two gallons of hot-n-spicy Cheez Balls?

Panel 8:
Just before business dried up, a new buyer emerged.

I understand you have a way to make social upheaval feel dumb?

Sure, yeah.

Panel 9:
The president would like a word with you.

Panel 10:
Soon, all the governments of the world implemented our technology.

Can you believe we once used weapons to suppress uprisings?

So barbaric.

Panel 11:
Peace reigns throughout the world and nothing is ever wrong.

I wonder… I wonder if the–

Panel 12:
Were you thinking that injustice exists? That is so awesome and brave! Here’s a ribbon for greatness and please go back to TV.

This transcription captures the dialogue within the comic panels as accurately as possible.