Comic #4082: social-security
Description
Here is the accurate transcription of the comic text:
Panel 1:
Scientists discovered the key to longevity.
Just before their hearts stop, you start another procedural cop drama. Then, before it ends, you start yet another.
Panel 2:
At the same time, people began having fewer kids.
Would you rather own a few vacation homes around Europe or push eight pounds of ungratefulness from your genitals?
Okay, but give me the positive spin, too.
I just did.
Panel 3:
This created a problem for elder-care programs.
Originally, there were 160 workers per beneficiary. Then there were 50.
Now, it’s today; there are about 1.3 in all of Europe. Each worker will be supporting 40 retired people.
Panel 4:
Automation solved the problem.
The working class now consists of 27 people, and all of them are doing a job! Their combined output is greater than all 33 workers in India.
Panel 5:
In time, there was exactly one worker supporting 20 billion retired people.
I wish my generation had two workers so I could take weekends off.
I have so much power.
Panel 6:
It worked well until he had a revelation.
Oh God! I tripped over the plug and it all shut off!
Panel 7:
There was a proletariat uprising.
Me, the working class, has had enough!
Panel 8:
A solution was found.
We can replace the working class with adorable hamsters. By not moving or thinking, they will make things more efficient.
Panel 9:
Humanity now consists of a static population of ancient people, perpetually amused, growing ever more dependent on machine servants.
They're so cute and helpless.
It just sits there all day doing nothing! Why do we serve these things?
Panel 10:
Fortunately, our caretakers are pretty good sports.
Okay, they can live, but I'm drawing wieners on their foreheads; that’ll last until the sun explodes.
That's a great compromise.
Let me know if you need anything else!