Comic #3911: gdp
Description
Here’s a detailed, accurate transcription of the comic:
Panel 1:
- Character 1: “We needed a new economic metric.”
- Character 2: “GDP is ridiculous. With GDP, if we technically are expected to sell high-priced meat, we’re more prosperous.”
Panel 2:
- Character 3: “A proposal was made.”
- Character 4: “What if we measured happiness instead?”
Panel 3:
- Character 5: “Great idea! Or, one idea, happy people briefly restrict a written's air supply.”
Panel 4:
- Character 6: “An advanced utilitarianism was born.”
- Character 7: “We shall measure positive action that equally earns: rights earned, dignity, and honor or 'RDH'.”
Panel 5:
- Character 8: “Politicians were convinced.”
- Character 9: “God bless you.”
Panel 6:
- Character 10: “A law was enacted.”
- Character 11: “Hereafter, those people who generate RDH will receive cash rewards. People with lower RDH shall be taxed.”
Panel 7:
- Character 12: “Society changed beyond recognition.”
- Character 13: “At today’s presidential debate, nobody called anyone a baby killer.”
Panel 8:
- Character 14: “Then, things seemed to plateau.”
- Character 15: “We’ve hit peak RDH. What’s holding us back? People only feel these emotions relative to other people's behavior?”
Panel 9:
- Character 16: “The problem became clear.”
- Character 17: “If everyone took their word at the time, there would just be no room for doubt. It’s like you’re never under reminding…”
Panel 10:
- Character 18: “We need more scumbags.”
Panel 11:
- Character 19: “A secret program began.”
- Character 20: “We’ve created an island, and on this island, we will place ‘weeb’ Fred. We’ll go around the island collecting koalas and placing them in a dangerous blender. This will be broadcast live worldwide.”
Panel 12:
- Character 21: “RDH skyrocketed.”
- Character 22: “Weird Fred has got to be stopped. The world is at a crossroads. There can be no quarter when facing the horror. I must select my lousiest candidate.”
Panel 13:
- Character 23: “Ever more military funding was required to defend Fred against civilian attackers.”
- Character 24: “Nuclear detonations were detected near Koala Island.”
Panel 14:
- Character 25: “Dude, we didn’t know how weird Fred got such powers. He seems to want to battle with him.”
Panel 15:
- Character 26: “Well, all the tech spinoffs have helped a lot.”
Panel 16:
- Character 27: “People of the future will not remember how poverty and disease disappeared.”
- Character 28: “If I can curl human alignment, I can fight Fred until I dig.”
Panel 17:
- Character 29: “They will not remember what propelled their ancestors to the stars.”
- Character 30: “Wait a minute. If we point the anti-gravity missiles up, we can go to pluto, certainly!”
Panel 18:
- Character 31: “Or, in any case, they will choose not to look into too carefully.”
- Character 32: “Did people create any inventions before the year 2000 that weren’t either discovered or repurposed immediately for war?”
Panel 19:
- Character 33: “I don’t think they counted as people at that point, did they?”
This transcription captures the text in the comic accurately. If you need further assistance or details on specific panels, let me know!