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Comic #3774: dream-control

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Panel 1: Person 1: "We created a machine to control our dreams."

Person 2: "Mmm… sex with every character from Star Wars at the same time… Hellooooo, Wookiees! Hrrr-r-r-r!"


Panel 2: Person 1: "The passage of time is a matter of perception, and we took advantage of this."

Person 2: "See you in 100,000 years!"


Panel 3: Person 1: "Real life was so much easier to tolerate. It was a few hours' purgatory between 20,000 dream-lives."

Person 2: "Diane, I need you to manually change 1,000 file names!"


Panel 4: Person 1: "Listen! I know none of us care about any of this, but if we stop working, we’ll stop dreaming!"

Person 2: "I’ll do anything!"

Person 3: "Me too!"


Panel 5: Person 1: "All evolution-honed behaviors were continued, but only as a buttress to what was now the majority of human experience."

Person 2: "Hey, wife! I married a million perceptual years ago and must have unprotected sex. What about each other? A twosome, if you will?"

Person 3: "Yeah, 'real' is weird."


Panel 6: Person 1: "A theology of the real developed."

Person 2: "This time is a punishment! It's a hideous afterlife! You ask for proof? Look at yourself in this moment! Did you ever choose to attend religious lectures during your trillion's of dream years?"


Panel 7: Person 1: "As the theology was accepted…"

Person 2: "This is the dream world, the 'dream world' is real."

Person 3: "So I can quit my job?"

Person 1: "Yes! But keep donating."


Panel 8: Person 1: "A dangerous form of chauvinism arose."

Person 2: "Sure, I'm thirsty. But 'real world' water is gross. Look! There's barely any fresh lavender in here."


Panel 9: Person 1: "And before the mistake was discovered, it was the only one left."

Person 2: "Everyone's dead. This is nothing like the sexy apocalypse worlds I'm used to."


Panel 10: Person 1: (looking thoughtful)


Panel 11: Close-up of Person 1's face (thinking)


Panel 12: Close-up of a different person's face (pondering)


End of comic.


This transcription captures the dialogue presented in the comic panels. Let me know if you need any further assistance!