Comic #3335: 2014-07-05

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Description

Here's the transcription of the comic:

Panel 1:
Person 1: "Oh my god, honey! Look! In the closet!"
Person 2: "I found the fossilized remains of our romance."
Person 1: "Very funny."

Panel 2:
Person 2: "Look! This appears to be some sort of flat cellulose product. There is an inscription on it, but the flowery language and use of rhymed verse make it inscrutable to me."
Person 1: "Uh huh."

Panel 3:
Person 2: "What the— it appears these ancient people had photographic technology. The individuals pictured are engaged in some sort of ritualistic mashing together of teeth."
Person 1: "Don't be an asshole, Sal."

Panel 4:
Person 2: "And here… you can see the people of the Romantic epoch fueled quickly by a tube of lubricant which has hardly been touched. Behold the dust of ages, inhabiting its every eldritch pore!"
Person 1: "We bought that last week!"

Panel 5:
Person 2: "Sorry, I must ask you to leave. I need to cordon off this area, as it may be of some archaeological significance."
Person 1: "I'm sorry I forgot our anniversary, okay?!"

Panel 6:
Person 2: "What the… This appears to be underwear, but if so, why is it not grandmotherly white cotton…"
Person 1: "…"

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