Comic #3270: 2014-05-01

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Description

Here's a detailed, accurate transcription of the comic's text:

Panel 1
Child: "DAD! I WANT MORE DESSERT AFTER DINNER. I’M ACTING AS MY OWN LOBBYIST TO REQUEST A RULE CHANGE."

Panel 2
Parent: "I AM PREPARED TO GIVE YOU A DOLLAR EVERY TIME ICE CREAM IS SERVED AFTER A MEAL."
Child: "FORGET IT!"

Panel 3
Parent: "THAT'S NOT LOBBYING, THAT'S BRIBERY."

Panel 4
Child: "OKAY, WHAT IF INSTEAD I GIVE YOU A DOLLAR EVERY DAY JUST BECAUSE I LIKE YOU, BUT IF YOU EVER STOP SERVING ICE CREAM, I STOP GIVING YOU MONEY."
Parent: "IT'S A DEAL!"

Panel 5
Parent: "SHOULD WE BE TEACHING HIM CIVICS AT SUCH A YOUNG AGE?"
Parent: "HE'LL FIND OUT EVENTUALLY, BARBARA."

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