Comic #2562: 2012-05-22

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Here is the transcribed text from the comic:

I hacked for 40 days,
and I hacked for 40 nights.
I hacked within the darkness,
and I hacked within the lights.

I hacked and I discovered
machines I hadn't sought.
A database of numbers
I remembered being taught.

I couldn't place the lesson
or its meaning or import,
but knew they were important
so I changed them just for sport.

The walls began to tremble,
and the ground began to rumble.
The ceiling ripped apart
and the sky began to tumble.

I clung to my computer,
but my arms began to rot.
The screen began to flicker,
and the processor grew hot.

I flew toward the sky
as the sun grew large and red.
I feared that I would die
and then the screen went black and dead.

I hit it with my fist
(which grew larger by the second).
The fan began to whirl,
and a command line calmly beckoned.

I changed the numbers back
To what they were… as I recalled.
My upward movement slowed
and the cataclysm stalled.

I fell into my seat,
and watched the sun begin to shrink
until the ceiling landed,
at which point I stopped to think.

I must’ve hacked the universe
In servers seldom seen.
I gazed around the mess and mused
“I hacked the truth machine.”

I went outside and whistled,
so I wouldn’t seem suspicious.
For the damage to reality
was vast, but not malicious.

My neighbors ran toward me
Shouting “Armageddon! Halt!”
I shrugged my shoulders calmly
saying, “Well, it’s not my fault!”

I won’t be going back to that
Transmundane DNS,
though I hope that someone will
someday, someday, yes I confess.

I hope when humans are more wise,
When humans are more worthy,
They’ll say “she hacked the truth machine,
Prematurely.”

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