Comic #1994: 2010-10-29
Description
Here’s the detailed and accurate transcription of the comic you provided:
Panel 1:
- Character 1: "We cloned Hitler so we could punish him."
- Character 2: "We gotta make him grow the mustache. I'm starting to think…"
Panel 2:
- Character 2: "But without power, he was kind of a standard dickhead."
- Character 1: "Hey, clone Hitler… you put my beers in the fridge?"
Panel 3:
- Character 2: "I care, but I will not offer to replace them!"
- Caption: "After a while, we felt bad about the torture and let him go."
Panel 4:
- Character 1: "Sorry we brought you into existence only to be reviled on sight by everyone you ever met. Oh, and fun fact: there’s a greeting card for everything."
- Clone Hitler: "Sorry, you're all awful!"
Panel 5:
- Caption: "He tried several times to start a fascist revolt, but people today don’t have the attention span."
- Character 1: "Roommate Andersen! We must rise against our oppressors!"
- Character 2: "Yes! I’ll start a blog immediately… tomorrow."
Panel 6:
- Caption: "When he ran out of money, we got him a job in tech support, where we figured his depression and misanthropy would go unnoticed."
- Clone Hitler: "No, idiot. I need two internets. One for me, and one for my dachshund."
Panel 7:
- Caption: "But after a few weeks, they figured him out."
- Clone Hitler: "I have eliminated everyone on my list."
- Character 2: "Why does it sound so creepy when you say that?"
Panel 8:
- Caption: "He couldn't hold down a job, he couldn't make friends, and he had a hell of a time finding love."
- Image of an OkCupid profile: "Three things that describe me: outgoing, considerate, genetically identical to Adolf Hitler."
Panel 9:
- Caption: "Finally, he ended it all. Fortunately, as always in life, there was a clear and useful moral."
- Character 1: "You can't judge a man by his genetics. Except sometimes kinda."
This transcription captures the dialogue and narrative from the comic. If you need further assistance, feel free to ask!